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self HD-ing

Recently I wrote about fear being at the root of many actions we take that are not of GOD. I also wrote about some of the conversations that go on in my mind about things I’m not happy with, especially when those ​things don’t make me look good.

In line with these two themes, I’ve now noticed that whenever those conversations in my head start, my spirit as led by the Spirit of GOD reminds​ me that nobody asked me for an explanation for why I acted the way I did. That may sound confusing so let me explain.

Recently I had a training to attend in London (remember the

bin post?). On the way there, my train was delayed and diverted due to trespassing on the tracks. (All those people that are not going anywhere!) So that added about 30 minutes to my journey time.

The enemy wanted to make me worry about what others at the training would think of my late arrival. And I responded with a reply in my mind explaining without being asked what happened.

Immediately, I sensed my spirit say, “Who asked you?” That question was able to make me shut down that conversation, because honestly I didn’t owe anyone any explanation apart from the emergency contact person who I’d already texted to tell what was happening.

Another example is when I do some driving that is not pitch perfect. An explanation forms in my mind that cleans the canvas and makes me ‘look’ good again. Or more like feel good, because of what I may think others may think. And GOD kindly reminds me, Who asked you?

Third example. I can be too self-conscious when I’m washing my car myself outside my house. Again, explanations form for the imaginary enquirer. And yet again, I’m reminded, Who asked you?

One more example. I’m running late for an event, no matter the size. I start making up excuses and reasons. You guessed it. Who asked you?

This question has recently become one that re-centers me to what’s important. That allows me keep my mind on what is important. Because at the core of those explanations, reasons and excuses getting formed in my mind, is fear.

Fear of losing face. Fear of people having the wrong impression. Of me. Fear that others will think lowly of me. All fears of others’ opinions​!

Because Bill Johnson preaches, Whatever does not inspire faith/hope, is a lie.

That simple sentence is so profound. It makes me question thoughts like these that feed any worries of what other people think, which in the grand scheme of life, doesn’t really matter much.

I want to live in such a way that I’m truly myself. That I live loved, living from a place of love, where my actions or lack of, do not determine the level of love I perceive I receive. That in my good and not so good days, I still know that GOD has settled on me as the focus of HIS love (Ephesians 1, MSG).

Worrying about others’ opinions takes me away from that place of living loved. I want my heart to be free and full of love as that removes from me any and all unnecessary responsibility to making sure others are pleased with me.

So I’ll continue allow my heart to be asked whenever it starts conjuring explanations​ to save face,

Who asked you?

To your freedom to be you, . . . .

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