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Writer's pictureChinwe Njoku

Schalp Attack – 1

One thing I tried to do during my last half-term break was get my hair done in preparation for the new half term. One thing I did not do, was go with my own combs and hair potions, because of convenience. That was almost my undoing but for GOD’s unfailing LOVE.

Pre P.S.: The full story is going to last more than one post. My plan is to release them every other day – about four posts in all. So please travel with me.

I was in a Manchester borough to see a pastor and service my car, then decided to make it a hat-trick by having my hair done – crochet braids (a first-time gig). I reasoned since people were in the salon it must be decent, so went in and waited. And then finally it was my turn.

Fast forward about 3 hours and many more complaints from me, the cornrows on my hair were done and the braids crocheted into the rows. The lady must have been annoyed or jealous that my hair was natural and soft (thanks grandma!), that she rowed the lanes too tight, it hurt. I was reassured the pain would ease in 5 hours. I gave myself the excuse I was being too soft and needed to ‘man up‘ especially as there was a primary school child in the seat next to mine. Thinking back, I should have just undone the rows and walked out!

I paid and went straight to a nearby shop to buy Nurofen as my brain was hurting! I managed to keep the hair from that Thursday till Monday when work resumed but I couldn’t function. My sleep was disrupted. I looked up ways to relive tight hair dos and tried everything including hot towels but no relief. My brother even helped by trying to wedge a skewer stick through to loosen it, didn’t help either. It was when a student called a cube a square and I agreed, that I knew fire was on the mountain!


 I quickly called my local hairdresser and went to her shop that evening, took out the braids and undid the rows and just twisted my own hair to look presentable for work the next day. She too was vexed on my behalf . . . lol.

Just before my first assignment at work the next day, I went to the toilet (as a teacher, you must plan for these things or things WILL NOT go as planned!) and of course, looked in the mirror to make sure I had my game face on. Only for me to realise the top left of my forehead was a different shade of brown than the others. Whaa . . .


I twisted and bent my head just in case the light was doing a different type of physics light reflection on my skin or had become racist! Nope! The different shade was still there. It was then I realised my head might be swollen. I thought to myself, “self, you used your foundation today though”. But then, my head responded, “self, you couldn’t have skipped a whole portion of your forehead no matter how shady your makeup skills are!” Self agreed with head and I genuinely panicked!

To be continued. Next episode released same time (-ish) next tomorrow. Watch this space . . .

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